Like most celebrity athletes, NBA players are no strangers to gentlemen’s clubs. These are places where NBA stars can enjoy their fame, wealth, and time away from the court in the most exciting way possible. Remember, NBA athletes are healthy men with plenty of spare time when they are away from basketball and want to have some fun with their friends and, sometimes, their teammates. Gentlemen’s clubs, often known as strip clubs, are one form of entertainment for multiple elite athletes across North America.
The latest star to be in the news with Strip Clubs is none other than rising superstar Ja Morant, who is not only a spectacular athlete with inhuman explosiveness but a winning player who can be the best player on a championship team. The Memphis Grizzlies have entered the championship race as recently as last season and are getting better in terms of gaining experience and confidence on both ends of the court. However, their star player is currently unavailable for a variety of issues, including gun-related incidents. Of course, he was also caught at a strip club which isn’t a crime but isn’t exactly the best look right now. Ja Morant might have received negative press, but he is not the first star player to get “caught” at Strip Clubs.
Let’s revisit the history of the NBA to entertain the latest All-NBA Strip Club Team featuring the top players in a standard G, G, G, F, F lineup that we see in the modern NBA. Amazingly, these five players will form an iconic All-NBA Strip Club Team that could realistically be dominant on both ends of the floor. Here are five iconic players who enjoy their time at Strip Clubs and how successful they could be together.
Ja Morant
Ja Morant starts as point guard for the All-NBA Strip Club Team. The superstar point guard reportedly terrified the strippers after his gun incident, and Morant just can’t catch a break. Ever since he appeared holding a gun during an Instagram Live session, Morant has been the target of social media and non-stop television news. Sure, the guard is young and learning the path to superstardom and fame, but his decision-making has been poor. Visiting a gentlemen’s club is something any adult is allowed to do, but seeing an image of him engaged in an act with a working girl is quite jarring.
Morant apparently spent over $50,000 over two days in his strip club visits as leaked pictures showed the VIP room full of money. The working girls must have loved the point guard’s visit, surely, but it isn’t the best look after all the drama the point guard has been stirring. Hopefully, Ja can focus on the game because he is extremely talented and can be one of the faces of the NBA, but at this moment, he is an esteemed newcomer to the All-NBA Strip Club Team.
Lou Williams
Nothing was better than the social media presence of “Lemon Pepper Lou.” Lou Williams, a 3-time 6th Man of the Year, is one of the most talented scoring guards in the modern era. Despite being a 6’1”, 175-lb guard, Lou can score with the best of them, and he was often difficult to stop in his prime. No opposing coach was happy to see the player coming off the bench and gearing up for shot after shot. Lou is also no stranger to drama, as, during the 2020 season, Williams was caught up in a strip club fiasco. The Los Angeles Clippers failed miserably during the 2020 covid-shortened season as the players did not want to be in the “Bubble” in Orlando, where the team choked a 3-1 series lead against the Denver Nuggets with a chance to make the Western Conference Finals. In many ways, we were robbed of a Lakers vs. Clippers showdown.
Team chemistry was an issue all season long, and Lou Williams was at the heart of it. Funny enough, Lou Wiliams actually trademarked “Lemon Pepper Lou” after he left the NBA Bubble to go enjoy some tasty wings at a strip club. According to Lou, the club was known for its terrific wings rather than its terrific…entertainment. As hilarious as that sounds, Williams did enjoy his serving of wings as he enjoyed the night entertainment. As the go-to scorer from the perimeter alongside Ja Morant, Williams has to be included in the All-NBA Strip Club Team.
James Harden
James Harden has been on a strip club tear over the past few years, especially during the time he wanted to leave the Houston Rockets. The Beard is a 3-time scoring champion and one of the greatest offensive players of all time, but he is almost as known at various strip clubs as he is on the basketball court. Harden, a player who is known to be close friends with a multitude of rap artists, also enjoys strip club visits where he can unwind and spend some of the wealth he has accumulated since becoming a superstar player.
Of course, we saw Harden appear in strip clubs when the Houston Rockets were waiting for him to show up for workouts back in 2020. Even today, when Harden is competing with the Philadelphia 76ers for a chance to win championships, fans are not leaving the player alone with constant strip-club references. Harden is clearly not the same player that won the MVP award over the last two years, and perhaps his off-court activities might have a factor in it. Regardless, as still one of the elite offensive players in the league, he starts as the third guard on the team to bring playmaking and scoring ability.
Kawhi Leonard
You might be surprised to see Kawhi Leonard as a starter on this team, perhaps because he is relatively demure and not exactly the most energetic soul in the NBA. Despite the player making claims that he is a “fun guy,” he is not the type one would imagine would enjoy strip clubs. Leonard is a multi-millionaire who is incredibly talented, so why would he not entertain the idea of engaging in several players’ favorite pastimes? Kawhi was spotted in a strip club, ladies and gentlemen, and he might have been with Patrick Beverley.
Anybody would predict that Beverley would be in the strip club, but Leonard being there was a bit of a shocker. Apparently, the two-time NBA champion was seen throwing cash in the air and enjoying the music, sights, and entertainment. Leonard might need some more relaxation as the next few weeks go by because the Los Angeles Clippers are gearing up for a deep playoff run, but their team chemistry needs a bit of work. If the Clippers fail in the playoffs yet again, we might have another Leonard sighting at the local strip clubs in Los Angeles.
Dennis Rodman
Everybody who knows the slightest about the NBA or Dennis Rodman knows that the player who once dated Madonna enjoys strip clubs. Dennis Rodman is one of the most enigmatic players of all time, and as arguably the league’s greatest rebounder and most versatile defender, he was just as polarizing off the court as he was on it. Rodman was unlike any player in NBA history because his way of energizing himself to dominate the boards and help Michael Jordan win championships in Chicago was extremely interesting.
Dennis was known to down between 15-30 shots of Jagermeister, get home at 5 a.m., and then proceed to practice after a few hours of sleep. The man known as “The Worm” was extremely strange for being able to handle that kind of partying in a strip club because playing alongside Michael Jordan was not an easy task. But Jordan, Phil Jackson, and the rest of the Bulls respected Rodman’s work ethic in practice and during the game, so he was always given a pass. Rodman’s resume speaks for itself, so the player has to be the leader of the All-NBA Strip Club Team.
This Team Would Win 60 Games Per Season With A Death Lineup
Even if each of these star players enjoys extracurricular activities outside of the basketball court and often visits local strip clubs in the city of Denver, talent is there. Ja Morant is arguably the most athletic point guard in NBA history, alongside Derrick Rose and Russell Westbrook, and will bring elite scoring and playmaking ability. No other point guard can defend Ja Morant one-on-one, so that makes the rest of the team even scarier.
Lou Williams is an undersized NBA guard, but he is quicker than most and knows how to score 20 PPG with ease. With Morant drawing a ton of defensive attention, Lou can rejuvenate himself with some lemon-pepper wings and proceed to score the ball in the NBA. Morant and Williams will be difficult to stop, even if they won’t exactly defend with ruthless vigor. Luckily, they have Kawhi Leonard and Dennis Rodman to support them.
James Harden is a 3-time scoring champion for a reason, and he will share ball-handling duties with Ja Morant, along with being a rim slasher and talented rebounder for his size. The Beard will create an iconic Death Lineup alongside two scoring guards and will make it look easy when it comes to scoring the ball. Harden won’t be easy to stop because he can beat any defender one-on-one, and defenders can’t afford to leave Morant either, as they can engage in guard-to-guard alley-oops in spectacular fashion.
Kawhi Leonard can play lockdown defense, bring focus to the team, and also tag along to strip clubs as the non-star of the show. Kawhi is the best all-around player on the team and possibly the best player in general, so he can score and also be the leader on defense. Expect Kawhi to dominate on defense throughout the season and form one of the scariest defensive duos in the Death Lineup alongside Dennis Rodman.
Finally, Rodman plays small-ball center because he can defend five positions and also be the Strip Club leader off the court. Dennis won’t have to be told to compete on defense and make up for the three guards who aren’t elite defenders, because he knows his reward comes after the games. Dennis Rodman will prove he is the NBA’s greatest rebounder and most versatile defender as he holds down the fort and kickstarts the fast-break as much as possible.
With four elite scoring stars and the league’s best defender and rebounder, the All-NBA Strip Club Team will win at least 60 games per season as they win at least 1 NBA championship in the modern NBA. No other team can bring four elite scoring stars and a terrific defender like this, and while they would be iconic on the floor together, their escapades at night throughout multiple strip clubs would create endless memes and news for NBA fans across the world. If only this would happen because the drama would be surreal.
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